Letting Go

A few years ago my dad and Inge met the Dalai Lama. That in itself is a story but not what I am telling you. When he met them he blessed these pieces of red string with a knot tied in them (I'm sure they have a name but I don't know what it is). They were to give to people they loved and they gave two of them to Andrew and I. 

Both dad and Inges fell off within a few months. Andrews fell off after about a year. Three years or so later and mine was still on. I think they were meant to bring you luck or peace? maybe luck and peace are really the same thing. I wondered why mine stayed on for so long.  But I was happy that it stayed with me. I would sometimes look at it and be reminded that I was lucky enough to be wearing a blessing and I felt peaceful about it.

Last tuesday I met with my shrink and on the spur of the moment I decided that maybe it was time to finish my time in therapy.  I realised that I felt calmer and more centered than I have in a very long time and so seeing a shrink suddenly didn't feel necessary. It all went well. She agreed with me that I was ready to go out into the world without her (knowing also that I could call anytime).

That afternoon I was sitting at my desk and looked at my wrist. My bracelet was gone. I was sure that it had been on that morning and remember fiddling with it as I waited to see her. I wonder, did the bracelet stay with me as long as I needed it? Or was it just a coincidence? I like to think its the first one.

I miss it and wondered about tying another piece of red string around my wrist. But it would just be string.

(Disclaimer, the picture above is not my hand *grin*)