Things End of the World Movies have Taught me

I like a good end of the world mass disaster movie, actually they don't HAVE to be good. Often when I am watching I find myself yelling at the screen 'have you never watched a movie, what the hell are you thinking' so to save us all from making bad decisions in the event of a disaster, I thought that I would write a list of things I have learned from watching endless end of the world movies.

First you need to identify why the world is ending there are 5 main categories
* natural disaster
* alien invasion
* biological virus
* terrorist attack
* supernatural invasion

Once you have identified the cause it should be easier to short things out but in case weird things are just happening and you have no idea of the cause its best to plan for all eventualities

1. Don't ever leave the kids - this one came up while watching a movie recently, but in movie land if you ever leave the kids to go and find someone you inevitably die, plus who in there right mind would leave their kids to go and find anyone

2. Always assume the worst - don't think that the power has just gone off and plan to still go to work, look up and there will probably be spaceships or zombies

3. Good footwear - this one seems to come up in a multitude of movies, women running in heels and often people have no shoes at all. If you are running for your life think about your footwear, either steel capped boots or joggers depending on where and how you are running and what from

4. Pack smart - even if you just think your popping to the country while it all 'blows over' pack like its the end world (duh) most importantly make sure of medication especially prescription meds, antibiotics and pain relief otherwise you will have to break into a hospital and this is probably where you will perish

5. Stay together - speaks for itself, you leave the group then your a goner, mind you there is an exception to the rule, if there is an army type guy making the decisions and only you and some scientist type guy have different ideas go with the scientist

6. Pick a good car - fill it up with petrol ASAP and think about getting a reconditioned older car without electronics so it can survive a EMP attack but then try and grab parts inevitably the car will breakdown just when the bomb or zombies are about to go off

7. Did I mention good footwear - really people this is life or death stuff

8. Save the books - if society as we know it is about to end, then you are going to have to know a lot to get it back on track, grab books on basic medicine, farming, mechanics, electrics, chemistry, animal husbandry and knot tying

9. Make sure you have a bag of salt - this one applies to all disasters but especially if the world is ending due to supernatural forces, salt seems to work well against demons and any slug creatures, plus it makes food taste better

10. Lastly don't think about what is valuable now, think about what is valuable once society is dissolved, the person with most food water and medicine is king

Good luck xx

Mischief Managed

Hamish is a mischief maker, he loves to stir the pot and to stir his brother. A few days ago he was thoroughly enjoying watching his brother practically tear his hair out by repeating a sentence over and over that Jack had asked him to stop saying, while Jack was brought to tears Hamish was smiling and looking very satisfied.

Then a week ago while Hamish and I were driving and I heard him say that he had ripped the book he was reading, it had been something he had been doing a bit that week. I pulled the car over and quiet crankily told his that ripping books was not ok, his bottom lip dropped and he started to cry and said 'I'm sorry mumma, I'm sorry book'. I was sad that he was sad but a little part of me hoped that that would be the end of ripping books.

The next morning, I was sitting eating my breakfast and Hamish walked into the room naked, in a little sing song voice he said, 'hello mumma, I broke a da bo-ok' he was waving a piece paper wiggling his tiny hips in a little dance again he said 'na na na mummy I broke a da bo-ok' He is so cute when he is being cheeky that I almost had to laugh ...... hmmm mischief managed

Gadget Love

A while ago I wrote that I had a new phone, a blackberry curve. I've had it a few months now and I say that I love it, beyond the fact that its pretty and shiny and has some great features, it has opened so many little communication doorways, and has made it so easy to keep in touch with people I don't often see.

I can sms like normal, the little keypad making it easy to write longer texts, and its bigger screen means that I can see what I've written so hopefully I make more sense. It also does email, that means I don't have to go to my PC periodically to check my group updates, HAS goings on and also I can read and write longer communications where ever whenever.

The last and newest fun piece of software that my blackberry has is a little facebook program, I don't use online facebook that much, but this little program means that I can just see peoples status updates, write on their walls or send them messages. The main thing I like is that I can see a little bit of peoples days and if I feel like it I can respond, and people who are online also see little pieces of my day and respond as well.

Today one friend who lives in Melbourne is feeling hung over, another in Brisbane is feeling annoyed by her computer game and its villagers, another has had a miscarriage and yet another is packing to go overseas for 6 weeks.

It is these little insights into peoples lives that I wouldn't often see if it wasn't for facebook and the fact that I never seem to get any PC time these days means that this little piece of software keeps me in touch, with help from my Blackberry.

I often felt annoyed at Andrew for being attached at the hip to his Blackberry, but I suppose I get it now, I really am a product of the communication age, not only can I not imagine not having a phone with me but I almost now can't imagine not having my email etc with me as well.

And well did I mention its cute and shiny and has some groovy little bits of software to but ....... I'm such a gadget geek sometimes

The Motorway

(Image from Doctor Who 'Gridlock')

I'm stuck in traffic, it seems it has taken me an hour to get 3kms and as I sit here feeling lost and alone, I look at the cars going the other way. I smile, trying to get some sense of connection, some sense of shared camaraderie that this road isn't going to get the best of us. Most people look away, some people frown like my desperate smile is invading the gloom of their metal box, but one weakly smiles back, and I feel it, I am not alone struggling to get to my destination, thank you for that small smile it gave me hope, that i might get out of this gridlock after all.

Captain Jack Harkness

I came to a realisation last night, i want to BE Captain Jack Harkness. Now this is a first for me, when watching TV i rarely identify with a male character and Captain Jack is so dashing and sexy that you would think i would want to be the object of Captain Jacks affection not actually be him.

You see the thing is i am a 'shipper (i think that's what Catriona called them) i think that means that i am a person that totally gets off on the relationship back story's in TV shows. Especially the ones that are sad and passionate and desperate, actually if they just love each other and live happily ever after it doesn't work well for me.

In Buffy the Vampire Slayer fans seemed to be in 2 minds about the relationship between Buffy and Spike for example. There were people like me who loved what this desperate angry lust and love filled story line brought to the show, and there were those that thought that it was its downfall.

Lately i have been catching up on Torchwood. Its a Doctor Who (the new series) spin off and its fab, well its much better than a lot of stuff on telly. As i have been watching a few episodes a night on DVD the relationships and story lines have solidified and i have realised how many of the characters are lusting/pining for each other. Some were obvious straight away but some have only just become very clear (i might be a bit slow on the uptake though)

That brings me back to my opening statement, i want to be Captain Jack Harkness, almost everyone he meets think he is amazing handsome and totally want to shag him (man, woman and alien). These though are not the reasons that i want to be him, he seems to fall madly passionately in love every second episode, and although the fallout from this is that he gets his heart broken every second episode as well, how wonderful to feel those first throes of passion every second week, and to find someone who feels those same throes for you, i think its almost worth the heartache when they inevitably die, leave or try to kill you. Plus who wouldn't like to be that dashing and sexy to every man, woman and alien (no cat people please:)

The Long Goodnight

Talking about having a good night, i was looking through some old photos and found these photos taken at our last Autumn Equinox celebration.

Again it was a night filled to the brim of food wine and love, and Trish and i were feeling very ...... merry.

I had to share because they make me laugh, they capture the fun and drunkenness of the evening, before you ask yes that it Trish's I'm really drunk but will be fine once i have had another glass of wine face :) and its mine as well .... thank the cosmos for good friends :)

This Weekend

We had a big wonderful weekend. Trish and Antony (I'm using you name on purpose now hon seeing you pointed out that i had done it before) hosted a beautiful decadent Winter Solstice celebration, we had a soul warming vege soup and a lot of wine, cheese and chocolate. All in all we left feeling very full of food love and good friends.

Me watching the party goers

Andrew and Antony in the swing of things


Hamish and I having cuddles

Jack and Arieal (his best friend) waiting for cake

Jack all caked out

And then what do you do when you are recovering from a big night out, well if your us apparently you go to the zoo. We had an amazing day, the kids were all in a wonderful mood and the day was a perfect Sydney day, so it was just right for being by the harbour. Some weekends turn out just right don't they !

Oh Green how i Missed You

A few months ago I mentioned to Andrew that something funny was going on with the colour on our TV. Things looked brighter and although that is normally a good thing, it was abnormally bright.

Our old TV was one that we brought when we lived in Singapore

When we lived in a much bigger space

I have disliked the size and weight of it ever since we moved back to Sydney, it is easily 150kg so it means that it required a large unit to put it on and it also meant that Andrew and I could barely move it and so we could never move the furniture around the way that I wanted to. Also because of its size it had an overwhelming presence in out little lounge room and when we didn't want to watch TV it was still staring us in the face.
So when I saw that the colour seemed to be going funny, in the back of my head I wondered if this was the end of the ball and chain that has been our TV
Over the next week the colour got even funnier, I couldn't figure out what was wrong until we watched a documentary on the Amazon jungle, unless there has recently been mass bloodshed in the center of the Amazon jungle it was apparent that our TV was no longer producing green, and it was replacing it with red. Also anything that was blue was now fluro blue, white was pink (because as Treena so aptly reminded me to produce white you need all the colours to combine) and the rest was this washed out grey colour.
Andrew said that it wasn't bothering him, and the kids didn't seem to notice.  I on the other hand could barely watch it.  Something about it made me feel uneasy, I think it had to do with the fact that because everything was red and blue it gave movies an strange eerie feeling.
So we have been watching everything in red and blue for the last few weeks/months wondering whether to fix it, buy a new one or go without a TV at all (god forbid:)
On the weekend Andrew went out and brought us a brand new flat screen TV, its still big (bigger than I wanted) but ohhh it has green and how I had missed green

The best part is that it is smaller than our old TV and it is much much lighter and so it makes the room feel lighter and less dominated by TV, you can actually imagine sitting in our lounge and reading, whereas before all it looked like it was possible to do was watch TV and maybe play with the occasional toy (while TV was on of course)

It Wasn't Meant to Be

Yesterday as i was busy organising dog sitters and travel plans for our trip to see the farm in Bellingen, Andrew got a phone call from the real estate.

(a little harsh perhaps)

Another couple had made an offer on the land and the offer had been accepted, contracts exchanged deal done sorry maybe next time.

I'm feeling pretty morose about it actually. As is my way i had started dreaming about that house and imagining what our lives would have been like living in the country. I pictured riding horses, planting veges, making jam and watching the kids from the balcony as they wandered and played in our bush land. I'm aware that these are all very idyllic dreams but that's the point of dreaming surely.

So please don't say to me today that 'it wasn't meant to be', i know that, every inch bar my heart knows that today, i just need some time to say goodbye to my dream before i can be thankful and move on.

Macgyver

I was talking to some friends recently about general house things and they asked me if Andrew was handy, i said that he was like MacGyver give him a pocket knife and some duct tape and he would build us a house, they looked at me blankly and smiled slightly and i realised that they didn't know who MacGyver was.

Have i moved into another dimension, or just another age bracket????

I started trying to explain what i was talking about but realised it was a lost cause so i made some remark about Andrew being very handy and that he could pretty much make/build/grow anything he set his mind to, they smiled and i made a quick exit.

So this post is about MacGyver who is apparently getting lost with others forgotten shows like the Kenny Evert Show and Fraggle rock

So come on people, remember MacGyver, the happy go lucky secret agent who could save the world with his resourcefulness (with said pocket knife and duct tape) and his quick thinking and while your at it save a thought for poor Kenny and the Fraggles

Cheezburger

Catriona reminded me of icanhascheezburger and LOLcats. Its something that i seem to come across every six months but then promptly forget about. Its true, you cant be grumpy looking at funny pictures of cats with silly subtitles

Thanks Treena, this one is for you

Communication with Children

Tonight Jack and I were at loggerheads. He is three and I am an only child, so its a normal thing to have happen in our lives together.

Me: Jack please stop being so aggravating

Jack: I'm not a robot mummy?

Sometimes a simple miscommunication can be all the communication you need

Matters of the Heart

One of my oldest friends rang me today, we have this relationship that includes him calling me when his dating life gets out of control and i, with my words of wisdom, help set him back on the right path.

Today's conversation was pretty much the same as always,

boy meets girl,

boy likes girl,

girl likes boy but slowly,

boy then meets other girl,

girl2 likes boy but fast,

boy shags girl2,

girl2 either dumps boy or goes psycho and starts stalking boy,

girl1 finds out about boys philandering and dumps boy,

boy realises that girl1 is the woman of his dreams but its all to late.

My mum would have called it Murphy's Law when anything that can go wrong will go wrong.

Don't get me wrong i don't think my friend is special in this way, in fact i have seen the same thing from most of my male friends, although he is one of my last single male friends, (it seems to me that once you are a couple you loose contact with a lot of singles i think its because you either remind them of the loneliness of being single or scare the crap out of them at the idea of being a couple and they remind you of the occasional monotony of being a couple or they scare the crap out of you at the idea of EVER having to be single again) i think that flipping around from woman to woman is a perfectly normal state of being for a lot of 30 something single men.

What is the answer though if you want to change, what if your average single man wants to connect with a woman and have it lead down the scary coupledom road.

As i said today, in my oh so humble opinion its time to stop leading with your groin, your heart close behind because by the time your head catches up your already screwed.

General rule number 1 when trying to start a relationship

Lead with your Head then your Heart and your Groin will happily follow

Seems simple doesn't it ........ perhaps it has just been so long since i was single that i forget matters of the heart (and groin) are rarely that simple

The Nature of Laughter

In our house i can often be heard telling Andrew that i am hilarious and he has no sense of humour. You see i am one of those people that make myself laugh more often than i make others laugh.

Be it silly songs or dances or just saying something that to me seems clever and/or cheeky i make myself laugh several times a day, most of the time Andrew just looks something between bemused and annoyed. True he is often the butt of the joke but no more often that i or the children are (of course there are many many reasons to laugh at the kids)

I feel lighter and yet fuller after a good laugh, i think that it is one of the best things that anyone can do for there heart and soul and i often feel sad for Andrew when he is slow to laugh.

Wikipedia says "Laughter is an audible expression or appearance of merriment or amusement or an inward feeling of joy and pleasure (laughing on the inside). " but it so much more than that.

• Laughter produces endorphins, the feel good hormone
• It has been shown to help protect the heart
• It lowers blood sugar
• It fights a lot of the bodies reactions to stress

There are even laughing groups and laughing workshops, i want to join a laughter group ....... mind you there is always YouTube thanks YouTube 'grin'

Blame the street party

There is a couple across the road who are moving north and this weekend we had their farewell bash. Its the nice thing about our street, we are all pretty close and come together for these events quiet often, this one took and interesting turn.

After an afternoon at a blossoming pregnant friends blessingway with flowing champagne we then we got home and the street party was already in full swing.

Anyway cut to hanging out in a neighbours house at 1am drinking G & Ts and having a grand old time getting more and more drunk, kids sleeping under the dining table and lots and lots of laughter.

I felt every drink the next morning, but i also thought back and remembered how amazing our street is, how great our kids are and how i enjoy being the kind of mum who can have a laugh and a late night with friends and have the kids cope well (in fact they had a ball until thy woke at 1am at which time we went home)

Still feeling tired though so blame the street party for the short and sweet post